The Daily Derenger

5/11/2002

The hotel I'm staying at in Peoria this weekend has a hot tub in it. There's also a pool. I won't go in the pool 'cause last time I was here, someone had just drowned in it and it was closed. And rightly so I guess. I figured it would be bad luck to swim in the pool this time. I don't get that much work as it is; I would get far less if I was dead. I was looking forward to the hot tub though. However, there were 5, 6 to 10 year-old kids in it. I sat with my feet in it for awhile. Then their mother and grandfather came over to tell them to go in the pool and "let this nice man enjoy the hot tub." I think they meant "get in the pool now. The skin head with a goatee and a tatoo looks like a child molester."

In other news, I went to a gay bar last night that featured a "Pimps and Hos" party. I had been there last year but not for such a party. Good time was had again. It was packed with drag queens, staright folks, gays and lesbians, and people dressed up like pimps and hos of course. I went to the bathroom with some aprehension. Not that much though. I had been drinking all night. I must say I was kinda upset though. I was in the men's bathroom at a gay bar and not one guy tried looking at my cock. All I wanted was to feel flattered. Instead I left feeling empty and not good enough for even a fag. First I was an altar boy for 5 years and didn't get touched once. Now I don't get even so much as a glance in the male john at a gay bar. What's wrong with me I ask? I'm off to the club to rant more about this shit.

5/08/2002

So I got in this discussion the other day that resembled "When Harry Met Sally" I guess. I've never seen the movie though. My thoughts were that no matter how seemingly platonic a friendship between a man and a woman is, one of the parties would like there to be something more. That's not to say he or she would jump at the opportunity to date the other but that he or she has thought about them dating and being more than friends. The people in the discussion were former lovers turned friends. My theory is surely confirmed in this such case: if former lovers are friends, one of them still wants something more. Or at least a few "benefits" every now and then. I've got many lady friends who I think highly of and have thought about being more serious with. I also have a few former lovers who I am friends with and I sometimes think about rekindling the flame. I laid these facts on the table and the "friends" denied that they've ever had similar feelings for the other person. I called "bullshit" and maintained that there is nothing wrong with feeling something more. It's not the depth to which a person thinks about a friend or former lover but that they simply do think about them at all. We all do and will continue to do so. It's called being normal.

5/07/2002

I guess this fuckin' thing hasn't been too "daily" of late. But here goes ...

I was in my friend's studio apartment yesterday. I realized that she had the furniture set up the same way for the entire 2 years she had been there. I also realized that it was a studio and few options exist in such tight quarters. I guess the most she could do would be to move the pictures on the wall or paint the joint. The couch and the TV just stay where they are. That's the way it goes I apparently. It sure beats being the "guy on the couch" at your mom's though.

Recently, the lead singer of "Creed" got into a car accident. It was nothing too serious but they had to cancel the rest of their summer tour. I bet it was all a ploy. He just wanted to make their "Behind the Music" piece better. Creed is a rich, Christian rock band who has seemingly been on the scene for all of about a week and a half. And they've smoked a little pot. They had no major problems, no drug overdoses or major deaths. Prior to this car accident, the worst thing that happened to Creed was that they had to use tap water instead of Evian in their bong. Now they have a fender bender to add to the mix. Maybe next week the bassist will stub his toe and go into a deep depression 'cause "Ally McBeal" is over.